Manager Daddy, Manager Mommy

girl 1641215 640There she is. Lingering after the meeting. Pretending to attend to urgent messages on her phone. Lying in wait for you.


You could write the script for the conversation that awaits at the other end of the conference table.

Her: Was that a good idea I offered about the XYZ?

You: More important than what I think, did you notice how the team responded to the idea?

Her: Yes ... they seemed to like it. {pulse, 2, 3, 4} But what did YOU think?

Family dynamics playing out in the workplace is a familiar enough occurrence, or it should be. If you haven't seen fresh, young recruits seeking "daddy approval" from higher ups, or noticed the easily-wounded team member and the co-dependent mothering response from a manager, then you aren't paying attention, in my opinion. If you've never seen someone in authority suddenly become the authoritarian parent, then maybe it was you!

Some say that's just my unique perspective, my relentless lens of early development. To that, I say, "YES!"

Truly, it's impossible for any of us--in "raw" form--not to reveal the imprints of those family patterns, even decades later. From peers to direct reports, from frontline staff to upline supervisors, from low woman on the totem pole to top dog, I've seen nobody exempt from the impact of the first seven years.

Some have created healing and growth for themselves, taming or transforming or releasing that early neural wiring. Others remain raw, like Her, in the story above. As is true for all features of individual performance, there is a collateral impact on team performance.

A need for parental approval, taken into the workplace, burdens a team by limiting access to the 7 Facets of Team Success, especially Independence, Faith, Negotiation, and Vision. Instead, the team is seeded with self-doubt and hesitation. There is damp on the ignition switch for the fires of innovation. Clear focus begins to give way to fuzzy thinking about desired outcomes and strategies.

All the seminars on strategic thinking and creative thinking, all the team building retreats in the world won't change Her original wiring to trust Daddy's input more than her own observations or any other feedback in the room.

Congratulations. You're a Parent ... and it doesn't matter at all whether it's a boy or a girl. 


Team 911 and Team FLASH! sessions can make the difference in these workplace dynamics. Take a look through the unique, kaleidoscope lens of early development, the juice behind the 7 Facets of Team Success: Trust, Independence, Faith, Negotiation, Vision, Compromise, and Acceptance. All these personal assets that are meant to be captured in the first seven years of life--but often are not--are also essential for high performance teams.

#followmy2019adventure on Instagram or Facebook, as I travel coast to coast ... to coast! in a tiny house on wheels, and make plans to book me live when I roll into your town! February is most of Florida! March is the far NW of FL and on into Mississippi and Louisiana, along the gulf. April is Texas!

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Dr. L. Carol Scott.

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